A Year After

Posted by lei on January 31, 2013. Filed under:

Wow, i missed this -this distinct feeling I get whenever I'm reorganizing my scattered thoughts and trying to put them into words while simultaneously pressing the keyboard. It's similar to that feeling of touching the guitar again after a long hiatus, or salivating at the sight of food after skipping lunch. Not exactly euphoric, but I'm ecstatic enough to the point that I want to shake my hands in the air like those nervous American Idol hopefuls and probably a pageant contestant who has just heard she wins the crown. The feeling is so complex and abstract that describing it is beyond the bounds of possibility. Weird, but I like it.

I am fairly sure that I'm not in love with writing, per se, but my body keeps on demanding for it once in a while. I can live without it maybe for months, but not for years, and I just keep on coming back to old habits and succumb to writing. Annoying. It's like my body thinks I'm good at it and convinces me to post a thing or two, while I clearly suck at this.

This is the aftermath of blogging for seven years. My body became so accustomed to writing down my thoughts, that the mere act of quitting this act all together is like unearthing a sleeping WWII bomb lying thousands of feet below the ground of Hiroshima. It's hard, or even lethal, and better left untouched.

I concede that giving up on writing is hard. But, why keeping up with it is just as hard? I used to blog almost anything under the sun, everyday of my life -pop culture, books, dramas, current events, politics, or even the most mundane things such as straws, refrigerators, and even misheard names of people. Name it and I got under my belt. Now? I blog every year, literally. I only post some musings or random things whenever a new year comes, but after that there's nothing for the whole year. My blogging momentum is almost nonexistent and I fear totally losing it.

I. must. be. resurrected.

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